Shyness, be damned!

What a roller coaster ride my life has been lately!

Available for purchase at or

Available for purchase at or

I am coming out of my shell all over the place and it’s scaring the living poop out of me!

I have always been quiet.  I’ve never been one to draw attention to myself or to relish the limelight.  My happy place is home.  I’m perfectly happy to spend the day in my pj’s, working on my writing or reading.  Never have I been a social butterfly desiring adventure or travel.

So what do I do?  I write a book (link here).  I honestly thought no one would read it, just my little family unit.  It would become something cool for my kids to have someday when I’m no longer around, something my grandchildren could read and say “Boy, was Grandma a character.”  Then Jim said, “Don’t you want to be successful?”  Well, yeah.  I do.

Do you know what successful means?  Talking.  To actual people.  What I’m NOT that good at.  Give me a keyboard and some time and I can string together words that make me sound like I’ve got my crap together, but put me in front of a warm body and my tongue turns to lead and my brain takes a hike.

Little by little, people started to buy it.  Little by little, people started talking about how much they liked it, that it gave them hope, helped them notice the blessings in their lives.  Which tickled me to death, to be honest, because that was the point of all that writing:  To create a book that shared the awesomeness it is to be a mother, wife and aunt, to show the world how blessed we are not because of what house we have, or clothes we wear, or even what weight we are.  We are blessed because of people.

People.   The very thing that frightens me to death.

Weight Watcher’s focus this month is all about the “we” in weight loss.  How grouping together helps us maintain accountability and motivation to reach our weight loss goals.  So imagine the fear in my heart when I found out we had to break off into groups today.  We had to be social.  And talk.  Gaaaa!  But, you know what?  If I want to be a successful writer I have to get over being shy.  If I want to be successful in my weight loss goals, the shyness has to hit the road!

And guess what?  It didn’t kill me.  I’m still walking around.  No one devoured me.  And now, since I’ve been struggling with my weight and wanting to buy a pedometer but never doing it because, along with being shy, I’m a chronic cheapo, I took the plunge.  I bought a pedometer.  I joined the pedometer team at Weight Watchers and the lady in charge is the most social in the entire room.  ME.  Super shy cheapo joined the group with the most social woman!  Go me!

My leader, Lynn, purchased my book and told everyone last week about it and said so many nice things that I cried, overcome.  It never occurred to me that anyone in that room would care to even know about my book.  Then, this week, a lady whose name I didn’t even know raised her hand when it was time to celebrate good things from the week.  And you know what she shared?  Not one thing about herself.  She shared that she bought my book and was enjoying it.  I was flattered to tears.

The point of all this rambling is, that, I needed to take my own damn advice.  I write a book about the importance of the little things and the people in our lives and continue to overlook said people.  People rock!  They may scare me and my social skills might be in the toilet, but deep down people are kind and nice and sweet and helpful.

The “we” in weight loss isn’t possible without them, so, shyness be damned!


About Miranda Gargasz

Miranda Gargasz is a freelance writer. Many of her essays can be found on sites like ScaryMommy, The Christian Science Monitor and The Huffington Post. In 2014, she published Lemonade and Holy Stuff and in 2016 she published Plus Size Mama: An overweight mom gets real about weight loss. She is also a contributor to Only Trollops Shave Above the Knee, and Lose the Cape: Never Will I Ever. Her debut novel, Haunting Suspicion, is being sent to agents for representation. She is currently working on her second novel, Dragonfly, about learning to love what you have before it's gone.
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12 Responses to Shyness, be damned!

  1. Where does one find this book?

  2. Beth Ann says:

    You are coming out of your shell! I am so excited for you! You have so much to offer and it is so exciting to see how this is going to unfold. There are good things ahead, I know!

    • Miranda Gargasz says:

      I sure hope so, Beth Ann! It’s very exciting to see that so many people really enjoy the book. It tickles me to death!

  3. Christine K says:

    I relate so much to this that it scares me! Getting out of a shyness habit is hard, but stepping beyond your comfort zone is totally worth it. It’s where you grow! I somehow got sucked into performing in 2 church plays and being a Girl Scout leader. I’m the last one to identify myself as a “leader” and yet now I sorta like it. Not being the center of attention, just living outside my comfort zone. “Why not go out on a limb? That’s where the fruit is!”
    Don’t expect to become an extrovert, though. There’s nothing wrong with preferring the company of books. Just don’t be afraid to throw yourself out there from time to time.

    • I love that quote about going out on a limb! It’s awesome! Glad to know I’m not alone when it comes to social phobias. People really can be frightening to us quieter, introverted folks. Thanks for reading!

  4. It’s an awesome book! I’m going to write my review this weekend. And you do NOT have poor social skills–no way. I know you! You’re wrong about that. You are absolutely delightful–fun, funny, smart, witty, charming, kind, supportive, encouraging, creative——– Need I go on? You SO underestimate yourself.

    Hugs from Ecuador,

    • Miranda Gargasz says:

      Awww, thanks, Kathy! You’ve only seen me one on one. When I get in a group I clam up and become part of the wallpaper, lol! You are so kind to me!

  5. Hooray for you ! My youngest has always been super shy and her first “real” job is helping her to finally break out of her shell. The more you put yourself out there, the easier it gets. 🙂

  6. Merryn says:

    I loved this post! Looking forward to read your book – I think you are a great writer already and I have only read a few of your posts :). Hope I can get some inspiration for my weightloss journey here too :).

    • Thank you so much! I’m glad you like this little blog! Running over to check yours out, too. We’ve got to stick together in this weight loss thing. It’s too hard to do alone. I hope you enjoy the book as much as I enjoyed writing it!

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